i’ve been doing a much better job at keeping my impulse buys to a minimum and taking time to really think through purchases. now that i can say with full confidence that i am no longer a shopaholic, i want to learn how to make really good coffee so i can treat myself to a latte once or twice a week, but not make it a daily habit. same with sweet treats, i need to make a rule for myself that if i want something sweet like pastries or cookies, i have to bake it myself and not go out to a cafe and buy it. this will likely cut down on my sugar consumption or make me a better baker.
so back in april, i used my birthday as an excuse to treat myself to something. i was on the hunt for the perfect pair of white, high waisted skinnies. i’ve wanted white skinnies for the last six years. i ended up not finding high-waist ones, but i’m happy with these. i found this top in a vintage shop. at first glance i loved the colors, but was unsure about the fit. it’s on the loose side, but it’s super cozy and it may work over a long sleeved collared shirt this fall.
this little one can give hugs now, and her little hugs are incredibly sweet. sometimes out of no where she’ll just come up to me and give me a slobbery kiss, or if i’m working at the computer, she’ll climb up on the seat and wiggle herself into the tiny space between me and the back of the chair, and she’ll give me a hug from behind. i love her tiny hugs.
i think back to my fifteen year old self and how i felt that rules were horribly oppressive; here i am imposing all these rules on myself. does anyone else out there do that? i’ll think, okay if you wash the dishes and clean the kitchen then you can spend sometime researching hair care on youtube. no way you can watch a movie or hang out until all your paperwork is done. fold the laundry and then you can have ice cream and on and on. gah. it works though. work hard, play hard eh?
outfit details: jeans american apparel, top vintage
–how i styled another pair of white pants
damn, don’t even remember the last time i made a film post, anyways, if you want a good laugh go out and see this one. via
so i’ve been thinking so much about this time last year, i had a tiny week old baby and my job was to be as close to her as possible, feed her and help her to feel secure and happy on the outside. i would talk to her jokingly, when she was still in the womb, and tell her to stay in as long as she wants because navigating through life on the outside can be a challenge. i couldn’t be happier with how she’s grown, how social she is and how comfortable and confident she is in her own skin and in a variety of environments. the sweetest thing as of late are the kisses. she doles them out ever so generously. she blows kisses using her pointer finger, she’s smooth. she’s starting to pick up on nonverbal communication. at first it was pointing, but now she shakes her head “no” both in and out of context and she’s been practicing shrugging her shoulders and dramatically throwing the palm of her hand to her face. i’ve learned so much about her and i’m honored and grateful to raise her. i’ve been thinking a lot about my mother, now that i know how much work goes into raising a young child and i’m grateful to her for all she’s done for me and all she continues to do. she’s cared for this wee one every single day since i returned to work and what an amazing support she’s been. there are some family practices i let go of and some i hold on to. ear piercing as a baby is one we decided to hold on to. grandma caring for grandchild is another. i have wonderful memories of the time i spent with my grandmother and i’m excited to hear stories about what she remembers from my mom.
so just like that i’ve inherited a new holiday. i didn’t think much of it really, but boy did josh take it seriously the entire mother’s day weekend. i’d be sitting on the couch and he would offer me a drink, he was so so sweet to me. he’s usually pretty sweet, but he was a bit extra. initially, my impulse was to tell him to just treat the weekend like any other, but then i thought hey, this is a good deal. i can sit on the sofa watching call the midwife and have him bring me a drink or some snacks. i’ll take it. the major shift was that i always visit my mom or would take part in whatever activity she wanted, but this year i could decide for my little family. i chose to go up to storm king art center. it was a beautiful day and i can’t believe it’s been five years since i last visited. the weather was perfect and we bumped into a few friends which was also a treat. so about this dress. last spring i saw the print on a bathing suit and loved it. i figured i could get much more use out of a dress so i searched for it on ebay and got it for a very good deal. i think it was one of the first dresses i bought postpartum and i believe i justified this purchase by calling it a “push present” to myself, ha.
if i knew that being a mama would be so incredible, i may have started having children earlier. i don’t think that i could have predicted or even anticipated these feelings. it’s humbling and i’m so grateful that she’s a part of our lives.
P.S Storm King 2009
this film is about two illegal immigrants trying to survive in london and the desperate means they are forced to take to earn a living and to avoid detection and deportation. if your interested in a film that’s gritty and honest this one is worth checking out.
images via, film summary via
every year pregnancy and newborn magazine features five fascinating mamas. i’m in the may issue, yay! check it out.
as you can see from the infrequency of my posts, i certainly have my hands full. last thursday, as i begrudgingly headed to work on my birthday, i came across these blooming trees. i decided i was ready to be back here in this space, as a gift to myself. a tad wrinkled and a bit linty, but hey… such is life. my skin is quite dry after such a long, harsh, cold winter and i may just get a facial. the last time i got one was for my wedding. with how busy it’s been the past ten months so many things went by the wayside and taking care of my skin was one of them. believe it or not my hair is three times this length. i got it trimmed for my birthday and while i never blow it out, they had to in order to trim it. i was really happy with how much it’s grown since i’ve been wearing twists and crochet braids as protective styles. once they added leave in conditioner and curling cream it shrunk right up. i love volume, but i do want to feel comfortable wearing it in twists as well.
my birthday was pretty low key this year. i spent time with josh and my little one. we took an afternoon walk around our neighborhood. elisane loves dogs, whenever she sees one she tries to talk to it and she gets incredibly excited. we had an early dinner at seersucker which was absolutely delicious. if you’re ever in caroll gardens, i highly recommend it. the food is high quality and locally sourced. josh remembered my request for tres leches cake, which i told him about weeks ago. we put the baby to bed and enjoyed cake and wine and an episode of mad men. friday night was reserved for a night out with my gals.
outfit details: hat h&m (old), blouse vintage, pants h&m (old), shoes lucky brand
bib gifted, all baby clothes second hand/hand me downs, headband gifted
after work, i come home to the warmest greeting imaginable. josh was sweet enough to capture it. could you believe she’s 8 months old already? she has two bottom teeth, she crawls from room to room and loves to dance. She’s so engaged and curious, my favorite age yet.